Friday, December 31, 2004

Hmmm... I might have to redo my goals.

We are at Amanda's place. Gina has been busy cooking and I am cooked on martini. :oD

More later.

Thursday, December 30, 2004

New Goals

It is that time of year when seemingly sane people all around the world put together lists of how they will be different, break old habits that have haunted them for years, and generally change their character... The New Years Resolutions.

I have no resolutions.
Nor do I have any delusions of what I am capable of.
Instead of resolutions, I have goals.
I make them every year.
And although I tend to forget about them after the first month, I have good friends like Cher, who remind me throughout the year what they were and how I am failing spectacularly at them. What are friends for, after all??

My New Years Goals, 2005, if I am not injured:

1. Lift weights average 2x per week
2. Run 3-4 x a week
3. Bike 2-3 x a week.
4. Compete in a Duathlon (a short one)
5. Run ONE marathon in ONE NEW state
6. Run ONE 50k
7. Run ONE half marathon in ONE NEW state
8. Visit and vacation with my brother and sister
9. Visit TWO new baseball parks
10. Go on a camping trip
11. Put together the wedding album and pictures
12. Visit NYC at least four times

My New Years Goals, 2005, if I am injured:

1. Lift weights average 2x per week
2. Bike 2-3 x a week.
3. Compete in a century
4. Start swimming
5. Visit and vacation with my brother and sister
6. Visit TWO new baseball parks
7. Go on a camping trip
8. Put together the wedding album and pictures
9. Play golf at least one a month during golf season
10. Visit a new National Park and get a stamp in my Passport
11. Visit Stephanie in Virginia
12. Go to NYC at least four times

Wednesday, December 29, 2004

Global Warming

It's amazing how warm 30* can be after a week of single digit temperatures.
It warmed up to 45* by the time 5pm rolled around.
Of course I wouldn't know what that felt like since I didn't leave work until 7pm.
Talk about a difficult easy week!

I did a bit of shopping since I was back in Boston for the day.
Got a bunchacards on sale.
Some of them are funny.
Now that I know that Joe's Granny and Great Uncle likes risque cards, I found myself in search for the most risque and politically incorrect card possible. Unfortunately, or fortunately, Christmas is not known for it's lenience toward cheesiness or political incorrectness...

In the city, there are a myriad of ways one can procrastinate from the Big Ass Presentation to the TAG.

But I did manage to eek out a 20-page presentation before I left work tonight. Yes. 20 pages. TWENTY PAGES. Dear Mother of God... I thought I would never get through the great Vortex in the Middle - the part where I had to work with numbers and calculations to show how I am saving the comipany millons of dollars in the first year - only my proposal presented a more modest savings of 1/2 of a million dollars in the first year and barely breaks even. I figure one should never be too ambitious, especially when you are promising stuff to a bunchaseniorVP's.... Of course the presentation will be reworked by my ever-helpful boss... I don't mind. I'd rather it this way... At least I know exactly what to change to make him happy - and I am the one he always credits... LOL! Go figure...

Tomorrow I have the unique pleasure of working on yet ANOTHER presentation. This time, it is to the CIO again, for something totally new, different, and revolutionary. Another brainchild of my boss. Enterprise Services. It's never happened before. People have talked about. They have pondered on it. The masses are waiting for it. And the upper eschelons of management dare not touch it with a 60 foot pole. But!... My boss thinks I can pull this off. HAH! Glad I have someone fooled for a change. Yup yup yup....Nothing like boiling another damn ocean....

Wake me when the whole damn thing is over...

Tuesday, December 28, 2004

Silver Linings and Quality Time

Shit Happens.
Every cloud has a silver lining.
And quality time? I don't have a good cliche about Quality Time but it's there.

I get in the car tonight at work.
I managed to leave ON TIME.
Joseph was waiting for me - something about leaving the keys at home but it turns out he had his keys with him blah blah blah.
So, while waiting for me to come home, he did a little of this and a little of that and ended up at the Borders close to I-95, which is the road I travel to and from Smithfield RI once or twice a week.

Anyway, I get in the car and drive it out of the parking lot, down the street, and onto the highway.
I noticed the heater isn't getting warm.
I look down and the temperature gauge had gone up to H.
And it continued until it couldn't go UP any more.
I call Joseph and let him know but I think that maybe it's the gauge that is broken due to the cold.

The heater is still blowing cold air.
I turn on the seat warmer, put my ear muffs and gloves back on.
I have a bad feeling about this!

10 minutes later, I merge onto I-95.
I start to smell something funny.
I call Joseph and tell him about the temperature gauge and the funny smell.
He says to keep going and go at the speed limit.
So I slow down to the speed limit.
And the car continues to slow down.
And I can tell that I am pressing the pedal harder to get it to maintain speed.
I press the pedal and the noise starts - a funny clinking noise. Only when I press the pedal.
I merge over to the right hand lane.
I put the gear into 3 (from D), put on my hazard lights and I call Joseph.
He says this and that, blah blah blah... all of which sounds unreasonable to me.
So I tell him the sitution.
I am a mile from the exit.
Blah Blah Blah...
The check engine light comes on.
I am a half mile from the exit.
I am slowing down.
The noise is louder.
Something smells funny.
Not sure if I will make the exit.
Blah Blah Blah...
I make the exit, and the noise is louder than ever.
And the car is slowing down more than ever.
I pull into the Shaw's Plaza - go figure (I had spent the day looking for the closest one to work online while procrastinating from the Big Ass Presenation to the that I could grocery shop on the way home).
All of the lights come on - the battery, the engine, the oil, and then the engine dies.
I manuveur into a closest parking spot I can find - it is HARD to steer a car without power steering!

And I sit.
Smoke is billowing out of the hood.
I talk to Joseph and call AAA.
I realize that I had better get out of the car before it blows up with me in it and while talking to AAA, I head over to the grocery store to get warm.

Silver Lining: I make it to the parking lot off the next exit instead of dying on the highway! And having to wait on the highway in fear for my life, because it's dark and because I will freeze waiting for AAA to come and find me.

Silver Lining: The car does not blow up.

Silver Lining: Joseph says I should go shopping while I am there.
Might as well. I was going to do it tonight anyway but had changed my mind because of his keys. And it's right there so take advantage of the opportunity.

Silver Lining: Joseph meets me 30 minutes later. Because he had gone to Border to bide some time before I got home, he was quite literally 30 minutes closer to where I was than had he been at work or at home.

Silver Lining: We call AAA to see how close they are - they had given me an ETA of 1 1/2 hours when the average was 3-4 hours! They will be there in a half hour!

Quality Time: We have dinner at the Dunkin Donuts next door to the grocery store. Had the ETA of the tow truck been longer, we would have gone to a restaurant but you take the good and the bad - we had dinner next door and spent time chatting and being together.

Silver Lining: The tow truck arrives ON TIME. And there is no problem getting things hooked up.

Silver Lining: No issues getting the car towed to Steve the Mechanic. The AAA charge is $3 dollars a mile after the first three miles. 17 miles. $51 plus $20 tip. And that is CHEAP.

Silver Lining: Joseph and I make it home and after more than 12 hours in the house, the Dingle Doggie did not have an accident in the house.

Happiness is where you find it.
You can either grump about the bad but amazingly enough, if it had to happen, all the stuff that we went through as a result couldn't have been easier or have fallen into place better.

Two words. Clean Living. God must be pleased with our Clean Living. What else could it be?

Getting Along Swimmingly

Yesterday, Joseph brought home swim goggles, a swim cap, and nose clips.
So, I scrounged around in organized basement and retrieved my swim goggles and cap.
Sigh... might as well. I haven't used them since I bought them a year ago. YES! ONE YEAR! Whatever.

We belong to a Y. A big Y. Joseph won a year's family membership in a raffle and we went last weekend to get ID'd and sign up. Too bad the family isn't bigger than the two of us because it's a nice membership to have and very expensive!

They have an indoor track that is about 1000 laps to a mile (not really, but anything over 8 laps is like the same as 1000 to me... blech). They have an outdoor track that is cinder - looks like 200 meters. And they have another indoor track that is 7.5 laps to a mile. Or something much more manageable than the 1000-lap-smaller-track.

They also have free weights, nautilus machines, bikes, spinning classes, treadmills and other cardio equipment, as well as an indoor basketball court.

Did I mention they have a pool? They have a pool. And that is where the swimming equipment comes in.

Since I've been contemplating the thought of possibly getting into a pool for the past year (or is it two?), I figure it's time to start playing around with the equipment and get used to the feel of it before I actually step into the pool. I have a feeling with the way Joseph likes to do everything FAST, I will be in the pool faster than I ever thought possible.

Now that the holidays are over, it's also time to get the bike set up. I am contemplating getting it all set up and have been contemplating it for about two months now. I figure by the time I actually get it done, it will be nice out and it will be time to contemplate running outdoors again. Then there is the whole weight lifting thing and making time for it all... too much for my brain to handle contemplating and pondering about.

I will say that I have to get to the store and get some cleaning supplies for my bike. It is covered in dirt and dust and every little part will have to be taken apart and cleaned and oiled. What a pain in the butt.

Speaking of bikes, yesterday we went to Copley Place and on the way back, Joseph fell flat on his back going down some stairs. And THAT is why I am afraid to see him on a bike. And THAT is THAT. He worries the hell out of me. I don't want him to get hurt at all. It bothers me a lot. So much so in fact that I think about him getting hurt almost every single day. Well.. not getting hurt but worrying about him and hoping that he makes it home safely... It's incredible to love someone so much that all you can think about is their safety. I have never had this happen to me before - this feeling of tremendous loss at the slightest thought of anything happening to him. It's wonderful and terrible all at the same time. And I know it's unreasonable on my part because he's lived a long life pretty well before I came into his life, but still...rational thought is NOT what we are talking about here...

Blogging is also good for procrastination when you have the Big Ass Presentation to the TAG to finish... sigh...

Random Thought: Remembering

I wish like hell that I could remember all the things I think about blogging (when I am not at a computer) when I sit down to blog at the computer. Sheesh.

Monday, December 27, 2004

Comfort food

I just had a slice of warm, homemade bread slathered with butter.
And it's really really really good. :o))

Reflections of Home Work

We had a minor storm blow through here overnight.
I would say that in most places 6-12" of snow is considered major but other than a lot of inconvenience, it's not a major storm, like a blizzard would be, around here. Next week it should be gone because we will get temps in the upper 40's. I am really liking the way this winter is going at the moment. :o)

Anyway, even a small dumping of snow makes it a pain to get into work.
And although I live only three blocks from the train station, and I take the commuter rail one stop to South Station, and my office is located right next door, I am working from home. I even changed my voice mail at work to reflect that "I am working from home due to the inconvenience of inclement weather." HAH!
So, I am working from home.

I have been very conscious of the fact that when I am working from home, I get little work done at home. Instead, I get a lot of home work done. Like bread. Right now I am making bread. I am thinking of putting in a load of laundry. I can't even say that I am using up my lunch hour because when I am at work in the office, I usually eat lunch at my desk. So there is no time savings there to boast of.

The work I need to do is the Big Ass Presentation to the TAG and GTB. The pain the in neck of this work increases the Procrastion Factor by 10, Foot Dragging goes into full throttle and I will basically scramble at the end of the day, pumping out a day's worth of work in the last two hours, accompanied by sweating, hyperventilating, and adrenaline-induced heart palpitations, and mind-numbing panic. I know this is coming and yet, I am helpless to help myself. After all, there is still bread to be put into the oven and laundry to be done.

I did schedule a few meetings, however. Everyone needs to have scheduled speedbumps in their day so that they can appreciate how much they would get done without these. Just doing the staff a little favor...

I am also thinking about my 2005 Goals.
I will track it here on my on-line journal.
I have two lists going right now: one in case I am injured and can't run, and the other in case I CAN run before I get injured partway through the year.
Just putting on some finishing touches and maybe I will post them in the next day or so.

Sunday, December 26, 2004

Christmas came early this year.
It snuck up on me and sort of shoved me in the direction of the future.
And I woke up one day and discovered that Christmas was just around the corner, in a week or three days.

Shopping was easy because I don't have many to shop for and we don't have have a bunchagreedy and materialist people to deal with.

I gave Joseph the Gift of Gadgetry and we used the GPS all weekend, going to and fro in the car. I think he used it for his runs and walks with his first sister, who was visiting the parents at the same time as we were.

Joe's first sister and we gave each other the Gift of Togetherness. We are going to treat each other to theater and dinner during the year.

We gave his other sister the Gift of the Future... she is going back to get her masters in Art and we are going to give her a gift certificate to an art store.

For his parents, we gave the Gift of Fire Prevention - money for a new stove because the old one is 40 years old and a fire hazard. Had the volunteer fire department of Chesire know about this gift, they would have thanked us.

We gave my brother and wife the Gift of Good Health - a Royal Fruit shipment every month for 6 months.

And my sister, we gave the Gift of Convenience - money to help her cope with the little inconveniences in her life.

The children were fun to shop for ... lots of educational toys. Princess Caroline and I made a pot holder together for her Aunt Pat, a gift from a gift, which she presented to Aunt Pat during Church on Christmas Eve.

In addition to the Gift of Time, the Houseboy Who Cleans will be coming this coming Thursday and every other week thereafter...I also understood the riddles that Joseph was giving me. The L from Linens and Things and the V from Victoria Secret stand for LV - a couple of handbags from Louis Vuitton was the most extravagant. I am partial to Louis Vuitton bags - they are simple and seem to meet the demands of my use - living and working in the city with all the gadgets I carry, they need to be sleek, slimline, as well as roomy and LV bags fit the bill. I was holding off getting another bag until I got my December bonus only to find that the day after I received the bonus, every cent was going to have to go toward the house, the contractor, the painter, the equity line, and margin account. So I decided not to get my bag. Only to find two under the tree from Joseph.

And I also received a wonderful Coach bag from my brother and sister, which means that I can replace my Nike backpack that I use for weekends and casual non-work situations with something much more presentable.

Of course, it would not have been complete if the 3D (Dumb Dingle Doggie) had not gotten a bunchabones and treats, and the 2DC ( Dumb Dingle Cat) had not gotten Catnip to get high off of.

Wednesday, December 22, 2004

Random Thought: Spinning Wheels and Christmas Memories

I have been surprisingly busy with very little to show for it today.
But it's been strangely satisfying, just the same.
Been to a bunchameetings where I threw my weight around.
Whimpered and whined to my boss who took it exceedingly well - and was actually FUNNY in some of the stuff he was saying...
Made up a bunchalists to show how much work I actually have to do in the next week.
If it weren't Christmas this week, I would be working straight through the weekend....

Which brings me to think about my sister...
I miss my Silly Sister. Sigh....
Not so much my brother because he tells jokes that aren't funny. :oD
Unless of course my sister is around so we can look at each other and roll our eyes.
(I am KIDDING about my brother of course. Of Course, I miss him, too! Sheesh.)
And my sis-in-law who is tall and beautiful and as kind as she is beautiful.
And my wonderful little niece who is just the cutest little thing.
And that is basically the whole of my blood family - our parents being dead and all
and the three of being orphans and all... it's kinda sad and makes me blue during the holidays.

I remember Christmas when we were kids.
When we first came to this country we didn't celebrate Christmas.
My parents were Confucian and Buddhist and my father had been forced to go to Christian Church when he was a boy in Korea by the missionaries there, so he hated anything Catholic... in Korea, you have Christians, Confucians, and Buddhists. Mostly. Anyway...

I remember our first christmas tree. It was tall and thin. We put on lights and garland and lots of glass ornaments. I also remember that tree falling down about every other day. :oD
We would all stand there in stark horror, mouths agape, as we watched the tree fall over, in slow motion.

My mother would run into the room, screaming and yelling, and waving the chopstick to threaten us with a beating. All the while cleaning up shards of broken glass ornaments and talking in rapid fire Korean - she always did that...
My father would yell at us to BE CAREFUL! and them push the tree back up, adjust the tree stand legs, and then tell us one more time to BE CAREFUL!

Of course, two days later it happened again. The tree would get barer of ornaments as the holiday season dragged on, the garland would become a little more unraveled, and the lights would all be a little more congregated to the bottom of the tree... it was terrifying when it happened but hysterical in retrospect.

This is one of the warmer memories I have of my childhood.

At the beginning, there were no presents under the tree. And that was okay because we didn't know there were supposed to be any. Then things changed. I remember going to visit one of my father's bosses at Christmas time. They had a HUGE tree with LOTS OF PRESENTS underneath. We were dressed in our best, and had been told to BEHAVE OR ELSE, and so we sat or stood uncomfortably as we visited with the Important Man In Daddy's Work. We saw the presents but didn't think much about it until the Important Man asked my brother what he got for Christmas. My brother, who was about 6 at the time, didn't blink an eye and went through a litney of gifts he had not received as if he had them with him right there... a bow, a whip, a truck, soldiers, and a tank, some dinosaurs and a book...

I GASPED thinking, "HE is LYING!!! He is gonna be in TROUBLE!!!" because we had not received any presents. I looked from my brother to my father, who was holding him in his lap, and my father was gazing down with a funny look on his face. I looked at my mother who was sitting there smiling like she had just won the damn lottery (except that the lottery didn't exist at the time unless it was gambling in Vegas), because she didn't understand a lick of English but she knew she had to smile when she was a guest at people's homes.

Well, my father didn't say anything. He just looked down at my brother quietly with that funny look on his face. The next year we were told we could have one present each and that is how presents found their way under our tree.

We also didn't know about Santa Claus and that there were supposed to be stockings. We found out about Santa and his elves by going to American schools and watching Christmas cartoon specials. The concept never really embraced me - it was all just story book and "yeah yeah yeah..blah blah blah..." until my sister came along and jarred me awake. One year when she was around 6 years old, my little baby sister, fresh out of Montessori school, sat on my father's lap and recited "Twas the Night Before Christmas" from memory.

She, who never really spoke, the one who was shy and never had much to say - rather was never really allowed to talk by her two roudy, scolding, opinionated and too-busy-to-listen siblings. She surprised us all that night and it was the talk of the family for years to come! It's a big book. It's a long poem. And she did it from memory. Not surprising, because of the three of us, she is the smartest and most brilliant of all.

And so, I credit my Silly Shy Sister with making me truly aware of the spirit of Christmas and of what Santa Claus brings to the meaning of holiday season.

Yes, I miss her a lot, my Silly Sister....even with her stupid blasted crazy animal dog of hers that is like Cujo....

Merry Christmas, Mia.
I miss you.
Wish you were here.

The Abyss

For the past couple of days I've found myself sitting lethargically at my desk unknowingly filled with woe and despair until this morning when I tried to reason out a solution to a business problem and realized that I might be looking into the Great Maw of my Death and Demise at work and I might actually *gasp!* FAIL at something.

So, I gave a presentation to the EVP of Architecture (who I like a lot), and he thought I should present to the TAG and GTB. These are governing bodies filled with people who rose to the top through operations. And as such they can be irrascible and grumpity, and sometimes they just play with you until you want to lay down and die, and all manner of things... And they not only demand smoke and mirrors when it comes to vision and strategy, but they also understand implementation. But they also want the "stuff in the middle." The "business plan" to go from the vision to implementation. And frankly, I suck at this. Why? Because I never did it because I never wanted to do it and if I had wanted to do it, I would have gone to B-school, which I didn't.

I call this space The Black Box or the Miasma with the Sucking Noise. I wouldn't know a business plan if it fell out of the sky and hit me square on the head, and since I didn't go to B-school, I don't know where to start.

So I talked my boss and told him squarely, frankly and bluntly that I was sitting here staring into the Great Maw of Death, or the Abyss and I might actually FAIL at something. He agreed that this was an area that I don't know and that it's a "learning opportunity." I hate it when he uses that phrase because it means I am not going to get out of doing it.

But then he moved on to tell me that he has confidence in me, so does the EVP of Architecture, as well as his boss, and his boss's boss. And he was not going to let me fail and that I am already 80% there because it I weren't, the EVP of Architecture would never have suggested taking it to the TAG and GTB.

Which of course means that I will still have to do the work, and wander my way around in the dark, only I am supposed to feel a little bit better about being lost and not knowing what the hell I am doing. Now, does that make ANY KINDASENSE??? Sigh....

And everyone is one vacation and I now have to produce this presentation and yet ANOTHER one for my boss's boss's planning session in mid-January... which means the next two weeks of Rest and Relaxation while the world is on vacation is OUT THE DAMN WINDOW! At least I will have no one bothering me. Which also means I have no one to yell at to vent frustration. And which means that I have no one to call if I need help because they are on vacation.

And he also said this is the next stage of development for me to get to the next level. Uh.... the NEXT LEVEL? What does THAT mean?? I just got to THIS LEVEL. WHO THE HELL SAYS I WANT TO GET TO THE NEXT DAMN LEVEL??? GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Phew. I feel so much better now.

Christmas Surprises

So, there is this guy at work whose sister I know.
His sister is Tiffany, who is one of the original members of The Club of Six (which includes A and G, who makes seven but not much of a difference...)
Her brother got a job here.
I passed his resume on, they brought him in, after a long arduous process they hired him.
So this morning he comes down to my office bearing a gift!
It's a nice bottle of polish vodka from Chicago when he went to visit there before he started working here.
O.M.G. I had never seen it around here before.
I can't believe he did this - it was so unnecessary!
Other than me passing his resume on, he did all the rest.
And it's a tough interview process here.
Anyway, what a nice surprise!
He said that Big Sis did advise him on the right gift idea I told him that it was wholly unnecessary.

As I told him, when we start working together on the capacity stuff, I will be running him ragged and beating him about! HAHAHAHA!!! I said I was giving him good notice on what's coming his way! LOL! And he actually seemed excited about! Go figure.... new people. Sheesh. LOLOL! :oD He is such a nice guy - very smiley like Tiffany!

Last night I took the generic tussin and I don't know what it's doing but I feel markedly better today. As my good friend Parker Parker pointed out, the bad stuff is the Phlegm and if you can get it out as fast as it develops, you are keeping the worst of it at bay and I might get through this bout of bronchitis with lungs in one piece. (Or two pieces depending on how you count them. Ahem.) That and the double doses of tylenol, along with the melatonin gave me the best sleep I've had in at least the last couple of weeks. I hope this means that Christmas will pass with minimal downtime, after all... Day-After-Christmas-Shopping will be here in no time flat!

Speaking of Christmases.... they are saying it will be cold but not white. Who cares? So glad it's not going to snow. I'd much rather have a wet, warmer christmas than a cold white christmas that slowly turns into a gray, dirty, slushy, new years. :o) Ever the pragamatist, ain't I? LOL!

Tuesday, December 21, 2004

Random Thought: Medical People

It's always good to have medical people in the family, as your friends and on your staff.
It turns out that one of the senior guys that work for me used to be a nurse.
And he came by and saw I was suffering maddeningly.

The recommendation: Generic Robittussen with NOTHING added (No DM, no COLD/FLU, no nothing) 1/2 oz every four hours... regularly to get the mucus membranes to secrete so that I can flush the bad stuff out of my systems more quickly. He heard me trying to cough and thought I needed to do this help move things along. And drink LOTS O' WATER! Other than that, hang on during the hacking frenzy. I also asked him about cough suppressants at night so that I could sleep and he said it is counter productive to moving things along. Blast!!! And that I should think about the sofa. And that should be ME, not my husband, not my dog, not my cat, but ME who should get acquainted with the sofa so that everyone else can sleep while I battle my coughing insomnia.... great. :o[

So, tonight, I am stopping by the pharmacy and do as he says...

Amazing. I never listen to anyone.
But this guy is way cool and he was a nurse, after all...

Random Thought: Running

I really miss running. Since I've not been running for the past - ohhhh, maybe 4 weeks -... reading running magazines, looking through running catalogs, reading about races, etc., hold very little interest for me. It's not that I don't feel healthy (because right now I am coming down with bronchitis according to Dr. H. and I KNOW I am not healthy), but I don't know HOW I should feel.

I am going to the ART guy for my foot but I am not sure it is really helping. I massage my foot and I can feel the stupid knot somewhere deep - and this isn't scar tissue - it's a muscle in spasm... totally different. I have about two weeks to go before I can run again. Hopefully I will be over my bronchitis and can try running a little and it won't trouble me any more.

But then the thought of running brings a pall over my head because I am not so sure that I WANT to start running again.

It's definitely a dilemma.

Random Thought: Illicit Commenters

I have changed my blogging to force commenters to have to register before they comment. :o) That oughta keep out the damn riff-raff. LOLOL!!!

So, yesterday someone commented "Is there ANYTHING you don't complain about?" And this was shortly after Debbie commented about something. I didn't know if they were talking about me or Debbie because quite frankly Debbie does complain alot! HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! (You KNOW that I LOVE YOU, DEBBIE!!)

I mean, it's a constant with your friends. You are allowed to rant and rave and just be plainly pissed off about stuff. And seeing as how I am blogging as way of keeping a daily journal first and foremost, and secondarily to keep my brother and sister informed of my life (and they know me VERY WELL), and to keep my friends in NYC and OH updated on my goings on with other people they know, I figure everyone who reads my journal, knows me WELL ENOUGH to know that most of my ranting and raving is done in a sarcastic sort of way. And that I am a very happy person who has led an extremely CHARMED existence in SPITE of the lousy people in the world, and who is eternally GRATEFUL for all that she has been given by supreme beings on high, if they exist. If they don't, then I thank my lucky stars! :o)

So OBVIOUSLY, this was an UNINVITED intruder to my journal, and they OBVIOUSLY didn't know me well... and they had the damn audacity to pass judgment about things that they know nothing about!!

I have other people reading my blog, as well, and those that have commented before have always identified themselves and they have a nice dialog about the event or entry - and they don't pass judgment! I don't know them and they don't know me but they read because they say they find me entertaining. And being a smart person, I never ask them "in what way?" After all, never ask a question if you might not like th answer! LOLOL!!!

And prudent advice for this aforementioned intruder is, as someone famous (can't remember who right now) said something about how it is better to keep one's mouth SHUT and be THOUGHT a fool than to speak and be known as one. Or something like that...

(GAD... It's the holiday season and I am so damn charitable, aren't I? LOLOLOL!!!)

Regardless, I welcome comments. I find it entertaining and I figure it's equal entertainment in exchange for any entertainment I can give to the reader. And I am constantly amazed at who out there reads my blog!

Random Thought: It feels like napalm...

So on the way home last night, I talked to H to find out if she was planning on visiting around Christmas like she does every year. Seems to me that she has a very busy social calendar and won't be able to make it but perhaps in January. Just as well because when I told her that my lungs felt like they were on fire everytime I breathed in, she informed me that I am getting bronchitis and there is nothing I can do about it. Oh, and it lasts a very long time, and I will break into a fever, and spew green sputtum and other nasty lungal expellents. Oh, and also, it's VERY contagious. Huh. She's a barrel of laughs sometimes.

So I asked if she could write me an antibiotic prescription and she said I needed to wait until the true nastiness started because, after all, an antibiotic is NOT a profilactic. ARG!!!

So, in a nutshell, I have to fall deathly ill for the medicine to work. :oP Isn't that just DUCKY??

Oh another thing... She asked me how do I feel about the news on celebrex...ha ha ha ha... She has a very strange sense of humor sometimes. I told her that I figured it was time to stock up! LOL! And she laughed and said that she didn't think it really applied to us since we don't take it all the time at high doses for a year straight. Strange considering that when the similar news of Vioxx first came out, she said she was SO RELIEVED that she had prescribed celebrex for me instead of vioxx...

Hmmm.... I must say that sometimes I wonder about H....

Random Thought: The Media and Medicine

It appears that regardless of how I try to order my thoughts for my daily blog entries, my mind is always gravitating toward chaos, or rather, random thoughts. So I figured I would go with it and see what scary things might come out of it. :o)

Which brings me to my first random thought.

I heard on the news today that Aleve - a popular pain killer, naproxen - has been found to cause heart attacks in a study on Alzheimer patients. This is on the tail end of the hoopla surrounding Vioxx and Celebrex. Interestingly enough, naproxen has been around for 24 years. I wonder if they will pull naproxen off the shelf, too? Or if they are gonna consider that maybe they shouldn't be giving HIGH DOSAGES to people. And maybe it's just people with Alzheimers. Maybe something about the brain chemistry and the pain receptors when dosed with naproxen causes the involuntary muscles of the heart to go haywire. Short circuit, so to speak.

Wups... I guess this means they will need a GRANT to the tune of MILLIONS of dollars to study why this is and then come to the conclusion FIVE YEARS LATER that perhaps they shouldn't be giving HIGH DOSES to ALZHEIMER PATIENTS and you should take it in moderation! Hmmmm???

There goes our hard-earn tax dollars again....

Second Christmas Riddle

Before I start the day, I thought I would report that last night, I got my second clue to Christmas: a wonderful pajama set from Victoria Secret. :o)) Happy Happy! So now I have a pj set and a home whirlpool tub thingie.

And I STILL have NO IDEA what Christmas will bring!
And it is bugging me a little, to say the least.
I am SO BAD at riddles!

Monday, December 20, 2004

Annoying enough, I just found out that there has been a second riddle to my Christmas present under the tree since Saturday. SATURDAY! That is like TWO DAYS AGO! ARG!!!

Now I have to go home and look under the tree.
It's not like I haven't had a CHANCE to take a look.
I mean, I've plugged and unplugged the lights all weekend.
Do you THINK that I would LOOK just in case???

Of course not. Sigh....

I am so tired.
I am getting sleepier and sleepier.
It might be time to go home soon....

Not MY Monkey...

What a total loss of a weekend.
I get up this morning and I have about 6 emails from my boss on my blackberry.
All about the 9am and 10am meetings this morning.
Turns out he is not coming into Boston but will dial in remotely from Smithfield.
And can he get this and that and this and that ASAP? ASAP???!!!!
Well, you can just wait.
You are NOT going to make me take your monkey onto MY back for no damn reason!
The last 20% of anything he asks me to do causes me about another 80% of freaking-out-nerve-wracking-heart-attack-inducing NOTHING! And this is after giving 110% in the first effort...
So, I have nothing more to give.
And he can just WAIT until I get into work for me to forward this stuff...

Turns out that I am not "well" but I don't think it's the flu.
I had joint aches and that's not the flu as I know it.
I also had dry mouth and a sore throat.
After getting out the humidifer last night I feel 50% overall improvement this morning.
Can't imagine what I would have felt like if we hadn't done that because the minute I hit the cold air this morning on the way to work, I thought my lungs had burnt out. In the warmth of the train station and the warmth of my office, I feel better. But out in the cold, my lungs and throat have a burning sensation - it was very weird and not too pleasant.
I am hoping all it is is that my entire being was being sucked dry by the low humidity of the winter atmosphere and that it can be replenished by the humidifier and staying indoors. I am sure that the cold is not helping much.

It is snowing out so I am cancelling my ART appointment this afternoon.
I can't imagine walking cross-town for it even though it is only takes 10 minutes but I. Am. Not. In. The. Mood...

Yes, I am In That Kindamood today....

Talk about a whole lot o' nuthing'!
After all that hooey on Friday from the Heart Attack OCD Man about the last minute presentation changes... The FIRST one at 9am lasted about 30 minutes and I went away with an okay from the EVP of Architecture.
So he wants me and my boss (which means my boss) to present at a TAG (which I have no idea what that is (Technology Architecture Group??) meeting in January, and then to the GTB (Global Technology Board) shortly thereafter to sell this initiative. So that means I HAVE MORE WORK TO DO!
Then at the 10am meeting, it lasted about 45 minutes.
I walked away with a bunchaquestions to get answered, and an idea of what the CIO would like in terms of future direction, etc. In other words, SCOPE CREEP and BIG IDEAS!!! With LOTS O' WORK!!!
But there was a demo and I brought in Jack (who works for me) to give it. The demo was scheduled for halfway through the meeting. Basically, the CIO went through the whole presentation during the demo and said he understood everything else that was left and that was that... which means we again walked away early but with a bunchathings to do.
Toward the end, the CIO asked me if I was going to give him an update in March, I said "Hopefully." The EVP (my boss's boss, laughed and said, "There is only one correct answer and it's not hopefully."
So I said, "Yes, I WILL give you an update in March." and gave him a BIG smile. :o)
LOL! It was funny.

So, the entire afternoon of meetings have been canceled.
I have to go to the post office and mail some stuff.
It is snowing out and there aren't a whole lot of people around.
Maybe I can get some real work done - or maybe go home early.

So this is what happens after I've been hit with an OCD-Adrenaline-Attack by my boss.
I surf the internet.
Today, I signed up for Netflix and put about a half dozen movies in the queue.

We are going to NH to celebrate New Years with A and G!
We will have lobster, G's impeccable cuisine, and some champagne that we got in Napa Valley at Mumm.

I am sighing a deep sign of relief....
I am so tired.

I might leave work a little early today....

Saturday, December 18, 2004

The Gift of Time

Yesterday, I got my first Christmas present, complete with a riddle attached.

I got to work and opened up my laptop and there was a card with a riddle in it.
It said I was getting the gift of time.
The guessing game was short-lived because yesterday was the day when I thought I had imploded.
4pm appointment to get my hair cut.
3:30pm was the witching hour to get there on time.
My boss calls at 3:15pm.
I should NEVER pick up the phone with only 15 minutes more left of work!
NOT if I only want to work for only 15 more minutes.
I pick up the phone, something about the presentation on Monday morning to the CIO.
Can I do this other thing with a task force and research and calculate the total spend (of something which NO ONE has been able to get their arms around in the first place), and can we do something like that blah blah blah....
"Are you thinking or do you disagree?"
Uh.... I clear my throat , "Uh.... you want me to do this by MONDAY?"
"No. Can we just put that as a one liner on the last page?"
Tick tock tick tock.....
"Fine fine fine...."
I have to change the presentation.... tick tick tick
I have to reprint the presentation. - all EIGHT COPIES of 14 pages!....tock tock tock...
It is now 3:35pm.
The last page is messed up,
I must print out the OTHER presentation for the 9:00am meeting on Monday, too...
wait wait wait, print print print, staple staple staple, tick tock tick tock...
Unstaple unstaple unstaple...
Print print print
staple staple staple...
tick tick tock tock...

I arrive at my appointment.
10 minutes late.
I jump on the elevator - thank GOD it opened right away!!!
My heart is in my throat, I can't breathe, and I think I am going to have a heart attack...
In fact, I hear a "pop" in my head - which leads me to my current malady of coming down with the flu - and a sudden realization that I haven't eaten well in the last two to three weeks because of the damn presentations - I had to get about 4 of them ready to give in a span of about 3 days - which may not sound like a lot, but trust me. It's A LOT!
I fear that I will have a heart attack.
A serious serious heart attack.

After my appointment, I go home.
Lo and behold, the house as clean.
CLEAN. It looked clean. It smelled clean.
My Hunny Bunny had hired a guy to come clean the house.
And he had been there 5.5 hours!
And THAT is how dirty everything was.
He will be coming every other week.

This also means that I won't have to spend time WORRYING about cleaning the house.
Or WORRYING ABOUT MAKING TIME to clean the house.
Or PREPARING to the clean the house.
Or any of the life-sucking things I went through BEFORE I actually cleaned the house.
And taking this weight off my shoulders almost undid the heart attack that I almost had earlier!

The gift of time.
Four simple little words that can't decribe the

Now only if someone can slip my boss a "relax and chill out" pill...

I think it's time to try that bread...

Ugh. I am so sick. Sick sick sick. Sick as a damn dawg.
Well, actually, I'm not that sick yet. But I feel it coming on and I know I will be.
The body aches and the chills are starting to manifest.
And it's the week before Christmas!
And two weeks before New Years, too.
The problem is that it typically takes me two to three weeks to start feeling human once I get sick. That takes me to the FIRST WEEK OF JANUARY!

BUT! I did make my wonderful meatloaf.
Joseph made his salt potatoes.
And I just took the fresh baked bread out of the oven.

Speaking of NSAIDs...
Just found out that Celebrex might be going the way of VIOXX - off the shelf.
The FDA, Pfizer, and the liberal news media are all tangled up, on the wake of the VIOXX recall, about celebrex and how it might or might not cause heart attacks at "extreme high doses." One test said 2.5 times likely. Another one said 3.5 times likely. And yet a third one said not at all. The media is reporting that it causes BIG heart attacks.

Now this brings to mind some questions.
So what is a BIG heart attack compared to a NOT BIG heart attack.
Sure, an arrythmia which causes numbness without having you fall down unconcious and die as a result might be considered NOT BIG. But I bet to the attackee, this is STILL BIG. The difference is that they escaped the clutches of death. That time. Once. And may not be so lucky the next time.

Isn't this a "side affect?" Birth controls have side affects - blood clotting which can travel to your heart, lungs and brain and causes death due to blood clot attacks. Or whatever they are called.

The other question is, what is considered "extreme high doses?" Is it double or triple the amount? Is it taking it every 12 hours instead of 24 to avoid the valleys that come with a 24-hour release medicine?

They are saying that celebrex is doomed and will come off the shelf, never to be seen again.
I say....

Gotta go. Time to go to my massage appointment.

Thursday, December 16, 2004

Some random thoughts before I forget, before the weight of the day crushes the strength out of me, before life creeps in and seizes me by the throat while turned the dials on the clock forward, only to be suddenly let go so that I can take a deep breath, look at the clock and wonder where 8 hours have gone. Just so I don't forget....

Thank goodness for NSAIDs (that's Non-Steroidal-Anti-InfammatorieS for those uninitiated in the world of chronc low-grade muscle pain arising from running-lifting-sitting-lying-JustBreathingToStayAlive phenonomen)... I've been popping celebrex, in fact double-dosing, because I happened to be sitting at the table two nights ago and did something to my back by just sitting. At the table. In a chair, in a standard just-sitting position. The miracle of pain killers.

[Funny thing happens when I sit down to write random thoughts. My mind goes blank. All random thoughts have a habit of taking safe haven somewhere other than in my brain.]

Okay. So that was only one random thought. More will come to me when it is the most inconvenient of times, I am sure.

Egads! The day is done and I still haven't finished this!!!

So this is the time of year when stress does my weight in and I lose a lot of it. In years past, it was mainly due to what I term "bad" stress - due to holiday shopping and unreasonable demands from ungrateful people who made a LIST of what they wanted, and it would be always with ONE WEEK TO GO, and would give different lists to different people depending on how much income they made, and would ask for a RECEIPT if you veered off that those lists so they could RETURN your GIFT and get what was on the stupid list!!! GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

It was due to having the number of people to shop for basically quadruple without help from He Whose Family Was the Reason for these Travails and Tribulations. It was as if they used Christmas to make up for the entire year when they basically did NOTHING for each other. NOTHING. Nada. Zilch. And because they didn't do anything for each other during the year, they used Christmas to make up. There were enough presents to fill half the living room. Which wasn't that big to begin with but my god, by the time you filled it with presents, there wasn't enough room to even SIT, which was made hard enough by the fact that these were NOT SMALL PEOPLE! He Who Is No Longer In My Life, His Father, and I were about the smallest people in the family.

And the presents. The sheer volume was daunting. Sort of when I look at a plate of food and if it's too much, I totally lose my appetite. By the time we got to Christmas, I had so much on my plate, I had no appetite.

Then there were stresses at work due to the regular job, with added task of budgeting, year end reviews, and setting objectives, which all meant an increase in work that amounted to pretty much three full time jobs. So I would go to work in the morning, work all day and forget to eat, then come home LATE - around 9pm - and then be so unhappy with life in general that my body couldn't do anything but be unhappy - which mean if I TRIED to eat, my throat would close up and well... you can't get down what you can't get down. So I would lose a lot of weight in about six weeks and then spend the next three to five months putting it all back on.

Even though the work stress is still there, I never would have believed that life at home sets everything right until I had life with my Hunny Bunny. Since being with Joseph, everything has been different. His family finds ways to show their love for one another all year long. They talk to each other and actually communicate. They conspire to find ways to make life comfortable for each other. They love together, they laugh together, they play together, and sometimes, they cry together. They are the embodiment of Christmas Spirit - all year long.

And most of all, when the night is dark and the hour is late, I drag myself into the house, and my Hunny Bunny is waiting for me with the Dingle Doggie and the Baby Cat, a smile on his face and dinner on the table. He knows I won't do it myself, so he does it all for me. Life is complex and simple and grand, all at the same time.

I am blessed. Truly blessed.

Tuesday, December 14, 2004

Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree....

Well, I was going to blog yesterday but I was so damn busy with another damn presentation that I ran out of time! As it was, I skipped the gym, and I skipped a dinner being held by IBM! Free food and free booze and I missed the damn thing! Grrrr.... NOT that I mind not rubbing elbows with people, people being people and all, and how irritating they can be, especially vendors who are there to schmooze and other people at work who if I WANT to see, I would go and see them! Sheesh. Instead, I went home late, had a late dinner with my Hunny Bunny and then "somewhat decorated" the tree.

Which brings me to the tree. Joseph got one for me the other day when I was at the store and running errands. It is about our height and roundish. It's not quite as Charlie Brownish as the one we got in the Waltham Street apartment but it's just as cute and I love it. After all, my Hunny Bunny surprised me with it. And I noticed it right away, unlike the wreath he got a week ago - took me a day before I realized it was there, and then it took me another day to realize that Joseph had gotten it as opposed to our tenant. Then it took a week before he pointed it out because I hadn't said anything, to which I said, "I noticed, I noticed. It's lovely!" He looked at me a bit askance and with a wry little look on his face. Ugh. I should have mentioned it right away.

Anyway, Joseph put on most of the lights, I did the last rotation and plugged it in. Wah-lah! Beautiful! Then we added a few dropplings of ornaments in the event the cat thought they were for her, or the doggie decided to taste one, or amidst the unbridled enthusiasm the doggie feels everyday, her swishing backside sends them flying off the tree and into the nether regions behind the couch - in shards no less because I have all glass ornaments. We'll leave it for a couple of days to see what temptations unfold before we decorate the tree a bit more.

The tree's persona (if trees have them) seem a reflection of our situation and life together. As our friend Abby said, we are the poorest rich people she knows. Well, as the years have progressed - three of them - the tree has gotten less skinny, fuller, rounder, and more decorated. The first year, the Charlie Brown tree was decorated with just a red bow. The second year, it had more branches, a red bow and a few other bows. This year, it has even more branches, lights, and will display a small highlight of my vast ornament collection. It gets more and more perfect every year (although, the tree hasn't gotten much taller. And that's okay. I've never had short trees before, but I am reveling in the beauty of "smallness." Regardless of the size, it represents to me the fullness of life that we have together, that no matter what happens in this world, we have each other, and life gets fuller and richer and more decorated every single day.

Merry Merry Happy Happy and Ho Ho Ho to All...

Thursday, December 09, 2004

So if it's Thursday, it's Smithfield Day.
I set out to get a bunchastuff done.
But the CIO came for a visit.
So everything I had planned starting from 11:30AM went out the window.
And that is an early start to a long day of doing sort-of-nothing...

First, he USURPED me from my regular office.
THEN he came around and gave me a hard time.
I walked by the office to get to the Admin and he yells out my name!
Fortunately, I was walking with Bill and so I said, "Oh, hi! Did you see BILL???"
At which he said, "BILL?"
I said, "Yes! Bill R!"
And Bill backs up and comes back.
And the CIO says, "hey you look like a Godfather..." or something like that.
And I said, "yeah, he's all dressed in black! He looks like he stepped out of Goodfellas."
I was soooo happy the attention was on Bill and not me.

Then my boss invites me to a luncheon in the CIO's honor.
All the SVP's and their directs in Smithfield were there.
I was a last minute addition because my boss didn't know I was going to be in Smithfield.
He said had he known I would have been on the original list.
I thought to myself, "Dang! This means I gotta switch my appointments around!"
Which, of course, I did.

THEN, I go to the lunch with my boss, the CIO and a peer who also reports to my boss (Bruce).
Turns out that there are about 20 people there and guess what??

So the CIO talks, and we have chit chat and everyone is nervous blah blah blah (except for me, of course. I mean what can I possibly do if he hasn't already fired me for it??)
So, tonight is the annual holiday party and he is going to it.
He says, "I love going to the party in Boston."
Everyone smiles.
He says, "I love seeing all the 26-year old admins who come dressed like they are going to their prom..."
Uh oh - all of a sudden, a dinning sound in my head gets louder and I can't wait to hear the rest of this...
He continues, "...trolling through the men for a date...."
Everyone laughs.
Then he looks at me and says, "So, will you be at the Boston party?"
I says, "Uh, no [his name], I am going to be at the one here in Smithfield tonight."
Everyone laughs.
I really wanted to say, "No... I couldn't decide on the prom dress" but decided better...

Now, he is known for his irreverence, calling a spade a spade, sticking his foot in his mouth, and all sorts of impolitic statements. In fact, rumor has it that the head of HR used to sit next to him meetings and KICK HIM UNDER THE TABLE whenever he said something he shouldn't have. HAHAHAHA!!! The reality is that it's NOT a rumor!!! LOLOLOL!!!

After the meeting, he says to me, "So, when are you moving out of Boston?"
I say, "I'm not. I want to be closer to you."
And the guy that was standing next to him looks at him and then look at me, and then look back at him and says "Now THAT's a good answer."
They walk away, and the guy says to the CIO, "That was a good answer..."
Then I know the CIO said something but they had walked out of earshot.

So, after this lunch, I am late for my 2pm.
So I have to cancel and reschedule.
And then I get a bunchadamn interruptions!!! ARG!!!

At 3:30pm, we have an all hands meeting downstairs.
It goes until after 5pm.
The CIO goes on and on and mostly repeats everything I heard at lunch.
Except for the part about the girls in prom dresses.

After the meeting we all go upstairs and I stroll by and he asks what I thought of the meeting.
I told him it was good and he shouldn't be all worried about it. :o)
I am not too terribly worried about talking to him like this since I know he likes what he calls "feisty women."
Then I tell him that a friend of his from his old stomping grounds (BIG NYSE COMPANY) tol me to tell him "hello".
He asked how I knew him.
I said, "My husband works with so-and-so and she is a very good friend of his."
Never hurts to get in those little self-serving, name-dropping plugs!!!!
Turns out the guy is a Big Honcho at (BIG NYSE COMPANY)!
Then general chit chat and I was done for the day.

I have never had this much non-presentation-giving-getting-asked-difficult-questions face time with the CIO. But it was important and I am glad my schedule got all interrupted for him. Even though that is why I am working late today... there is a price to be paid for face time, I suppose. Not to mention that I will get even MORE crap from him on the 20th when I give him the presentation I should be working on NOW instead of blogging.

Then at 6pm, I went to the annual party with the staff.
This year's theme was Carnival. I didn't get the theme and why they chose it.
They have had better years.
But all the themes from year to year tend to run together because I have been to so many, not to mention that I am usually there only for the free booze and the free food and to socialize with my staff - all of whom I like except for one but then she wasn't there.

The best part is that one of the EVPs at the luncheon was there with all his Hangers On, who were also at the lunch. I was walking toward him and he recognized me, called me over and we had some general chit chat and the Hangers On also chit chatted with me. I HAD to meet this guy because it makes my job SO MUCH EASIER! So the holiday party even worked out better than expected!

So, it was a fruitful day for not having gotten much DONE.
Of course it depends on the definition of "done."

Wednesday, December 08, 2004

The other rocking chair arrived yesterday morning. Now the living room is somewhat complete - just need to get all the boxes out of it and get it all arranged and it should be nice.

So Monday night's plan to do a bunchastuff after work ended in disaster.
I got home in the snow and rain and I told Joseph,
"I am SO not going out there again."
And he said, "I had no doubt you would NOT be going out tonight."
Then he laughed. Hmph.

Last night I managed to get myself to the L-Street Running Club last meeting of the year for the annual Dissemination of the Charity Checks and the Annual Shorted Elections in History. We gave away about $250,000 in charity checks - one of the highest ever. A lot of people in the club are involved in major charities. This club also has a really big profile with the police, the city, the TV stations, etc., because the members have connections, and because we give to all members' connections' favorite charities. Which then means the members continue to have connections. Which means we continue to give to their charities... and round and round we go....

One of the people there (Kathia) works with The Neighborhood House - a local support organization that gives Christmas baskets (among other things) to the needy families in South Boston who live in the projects. I delivered baskets one year and that was just crazy! It was scary enough for me not to want to do it again. Anyway, I picked up 6 kids' names - this weekend, I'll go shopping for them so that they can wake up to gifts from Santa on Christmas morning. It's kinda cool.

So today at staff meeting I find out that we are moving from our current 6th floor location up to the 8th floor. My boss then took the opportunity to do the due diligence to make sure that the people who are in Boston should be in Boston.
Of course, that meant I immediately said "I can't see to drive at night, I have BAD night vision."
Which of course led another manager to state the same thing - that she has bad peripheral vision, especially at night and her husband finally told [her] this was so ridiculous that [she] should just stay over in a hotel when [she] is in the RI office." Interesting.
Which of course I then said that "if I had to drive to RI every single day, I would quit." (And take my ball with me too while I am at it. Harrumph.)

I went to the ART doctor to get my foot worked on as recommended by my orthod doctor.
O.M.G. It hurt. Ten minutes of pain. SEARING PAIN! Well... not quite searing but it's a portent of things to come, I am sure about that. Especially since he said he would go light on me since it's the first time the foot was being worked on. I will say that after the treatment, the foot felt so much freer! I might have to have him work on the other foot to even things out!

Gym Note. Why is it that I have the hardest damn time getting my ass out the door and into the damn gym? Once I get there I love it. In fact, I have a ball! But the getting there is such a damn issue for me! ARG!!! Well, I DID manage to make it to the gym today. Second time this week. Yeah! I did the usual full body work out and it felt really good.

I love watching people at the gym. There are some people who quite literally give the phrase "throwing some iron around" new meaning. There are others who affirm the saying quite in the literal sense. Then there are other who lift weights and shouldn't be. They should be going to remedial weight lifting class instead. At the very least, an anatomy class so they realize that with the move they are doing, they are working EVERYTHING but what they THINK they are.

I watched this one woman do bicep curls, at least that is what I thought she was doing. She seemed to be an endomorph. She was sort of marshmallowy but she had strength because she was using 20-lb dumbbells. Anyway, she entertained me through a set of french presses, front lats, and deltoids. Two sets of each. All she did during this time was damn bicep curls!

Her beginning stance was correct - feet apart, legs tight, knees flexible, arms to the side holding the weights. She would then bend her right elbow out to the side away from the body, then push her elbow to her waist, using this leverage, she would throw the dumbell up and then back down. Then she would do it with her other arm. Now, it seemed to me that (a) she was doing it all too fast. If I had done my curls at her speed, I would have been able to lift 25 lbs at least. (b) She was exercising her triceps, trapezious and lats. I wasn't sure where the biceps came in. I could see this because she had on a thin shirt and I could see these muscles working to "throw" the weight up to her face. And she did this in such rapid succession, I thought she was going to knock herself out. I watched with interest just in case she did.

Anyway.... I see so much of this at the gym. I don't get it. Where are the people who should be watching people to see if they do things right and not get hurt!

So in a way, this woman THINKS she is working her biceps but she isn't.
And since she is doing the wrong exercises for the other parts she was working, they won't get developed either.

Which means that she is destined to remain soft and marshmallowy for a long time to come.

The best part of going to the gym is watching myself in the mirror.
I don't mean in a vain way but watching each muscle that I work.
I love starting out on a machine with no definition.
By the end of the second rep, I can identify each muscle group.
For example, when I do the leg extensions, I start out and my legs are working and kind of one amorphous mass. By the end of the second set, I can see each head of the quadracep muscles as they contract and release. And when I stand in front of the mirror to do bicep curls afterwards, I can see the four different heads of the quads tighten and stand out. I love that.
I can now see deltoids, biceps, and triceps as well.
I just love that!

I can already tell that if I get into this hard core again, I will definitely work with a nutritionist to get the body fat down and get really cut. When I was lifting before, I didn't do much cardio and didn't watch my diet. I hope to be smarter this time and put it all together. But time will tell. Really. Time WILL tell - especially as I have a hard time with finding TIME to go to the damn gym in the first place! GAH!!!!

Monday, December 06, 2004

Well, Monday morning makes an entry with a roar.
I answered 6 emails from my boss before I was dressed and out the door this morning.
And it's the first really cold day of the year - right now, it's 26*.

I get on the elevator at work and the Elevator Lady in the Speaker says to us, "you are pressing two many buttons [the button lights go out]. Do not be alarmed. We are experiencing minor technical difficulties."

The button lights going out happens a lot.
But technical difficulties?
How many technical difficulties can there be on an elevator?
How many technical difficulties can be minor when the thing only goes up and down?

And if you are going UP and you are having a difficulty going UP, it kinda leads you to think that it might go DOWN. With DIFFICULTY. Which means NOT in a controlled fashion but with wild abandon! Hellooooo!

'Tis the season, ain't it?

Speaking of technical difficulties.
The front of our building is being worked on.
It's a major renovation and at this time they are working outside on the wrap around patio-steps-porch-entry area (not sure what you call it) and they have these Steelco Fences all around the working area. Turns out that someone in HR, who uses a walker (btw), was walking along when a big gust of wind knocked the fench down right on top of her. Can you IMAGINE?? I was talking to someone about it on Friday and we couldn't help laughing at the picture of it in our minds. It seems a bit cruel unless you have seen this person - she really uses a walker - something with MS or some such other thing. Not sure. And the next day the green barrier they put up to keep people from looking in and keep the dust at bay along the chain link is gone gone gone - I think there wasn't enough air circulation through those things to let the wind pass easily, thus knocking the fence down. She got taken away in an ambulance, supposedly. And do you think she will ever come back to work? Uh... NOT! Big Bucks. She's never gonna have to work again. "Good for her" we said in between snorts of laughter that we were trying to stifle between heaves. "Might as well go out in style." After all, 'tis the season! :oD

It might be time to play the lottery.

I was talking to G about a job at her work.
CTO position might be coming up.
Might be the kindafun and challenging thing I might be interested in.
I have been definitely think about this type of work for the past year.
Could amount to something. One never knows.

End of day note:
I am heading out to the gym. I have a full night of stuff to do ahead of me. And this is after a full day at work. I worked on a presentation all day. One presentation. ALL DAY. This is the second iteration and I am still missing information. Sigh....

It is, I say, it is time to play the lottery....

Sunday, December 05, 2004

The weekend is over. Almost. Phew! What an EXHAUSTING relaxing slow weekend! GAH!!!

So, this morning, Joseph meets up with the Deads. A couple of them from last night.
The same group we are meeting next weekend at Redbones for our annual holiday dinner.
Not all but a subset.
They go running in Newton - all complicated coordination - some start at 8:30, others at 9:30, some go 10 miles, others for 5 or 6, some do 12... yadda yadda yadda.
I was happy to just STAY HOME!

So I met them after there run and we went to Bobby's New York Style Deli in Newton - over Heartbreak Hill, at around mile 20.5 of the marathon course... It's a real Jewish Deli. I have always stopped in their for YEARS to get water, take a rest, get out of the cold or heat... and I always said I should come back for breakfast. The guy who owns it was very accommodating and the regulars were good enough to move over and share a table with someone else so that the tables could be pushed together to accommodate the seven of us. He said that he has more runners getting water and using the facilities than eating there! We told him we are going to bring back much bigger group - maybe in March! :oD

It was the first time I've had a knish.
The first time I've had a potato pancake.
The first time I've had a blintz.
Yup. I am definitely going back!

So in some ways it's been busy.
In other ways relaxing - no running or biking or lifting at all.
Tomorrow is another day, the beginning of a new week - I guess life gets back to normal. Again.