Monday, May 11, 2009

The Difference

Between training and working out. My Hunny Bunny posted this question to a running club we belong to. So I had to really think about this one. I mean, really think about it and put it all out there. Can't fake it or make it something that's it's not.

Do I train or do I work out?

Wow.

I never thought I would train.
I only worked out.
I missed days.
I made excuses.
I was on again and off again - 2 weeks on and 50 weeks off.
I gave in when it hurt. And when it hurt, I knew I would die.
It was excuse after excuse.
And thinking I'd never be good enough.
Good enough compared to you, compared to him, compared to her, compared to whoever I could find that would prove that I wasn't good enough.

Until, one day, I said "enough."
And I decided to shape what was "good enough."
Now I train.
I train to reach that place that others find so naturally when they train.
I am almost there.
That natural state.
Fearless.
Knowing it will hurt and welcoming the pain.
Knowing that from the ashes, the Phoenix rises anew.
I want to be that Phoenix, reaching and striving.
I am almost there.

So, I am practicing my training.
Training to be in training.
And then one day, I will know that I have arrived.
Don't know how.
But I will.
It's a mental state.

I want to "Be Epic."
But for now, I am trying to qualify for the mental game.

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