Saturday, October 16, 2010

It's time to be human

I saw my Daddy last night. He came to me at my most vulnerable moment. Falling down from sheer exhaustion, delirious from lack of sleep, and on the verge of hallucinations. I think that's when the Native Americans saw their visions.

Anyway, I put my head on my pillow and my Daddy whispered in my ear.

"It's time to be fully human."

And I saw Joseph and my Daddy meeting in Joseph's dream so many years ago. A wordless greeting and exchange. A smile and a nod. The picture faded and my family appeared. JJ, Joseph and me playing a game on the floor of our green living room, laughing and hugging and arguing about who's winning. Of course, JJ insisting he is winning and changing all the rules. :o)

And my Daddy said "It's time to be fully human."

It reminds me of something Jesus said to Zacchaeus in Rev 3:20:
“Look, I am standing at the door, knocking. If one of you hears me calling and opens the door, I will come in to share a meal at that person’s side.”
It is time to open the door of my heart because my family is knocking. They will not force their way in. I must invite them in and let them nestle there forever.

And so the inward journey has started. With the full approval and a slap from my Daddy, reaching from the ashes of his bones hidden in a box somewhere telling me it's time to grow up and be what was foretold. And live the dream that I have built. That Joseph and I have built.

In my 51st year, I will be reborn and become a fully human.

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